Anatomy of this Outfit: Dress – Urban Outfitters | Coat – Topshop | Hat – Urban Outfitters | Boots – H&M | Tights – H&M

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Maybe it’s the fact that I had about one of the best new years ever and am feeling nostalgic and sappy as hell, or the fact that I have been working a lot on self improvement and forging positive relationships, but I am feeling so blessed to be surrounded by so many amazing, interesting, unique, and kind people in my life. Now, I might already have been alive for 28 years, but it has only been within the last year that I have really learned what friendship really truly is. That is not to say that I never had true friendships until now – many of my hometown friends are friendships that were formed decades ago. I was also not notorious for being a shitty friend or shit storm starter.

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Granted, I’m sure there were times I was at fault for the ending of a friendship, in addition to some friendships simply fading away with time or as an old friend and I drifted apart as we both began to change, for every good friend I have had, I have tended to have another friendship wrought with drama. Suffice it to say, friendships have been quite hit or miss for me. The main reason so many of my friendships had been similar to a game of Russian roulette is that I tended to trust too easily, considered people friends too fast, and continuously put my hand in the fire after it had already been burned by someone I thought I could trust.

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I know that it might come across as ridiculous that I tried to hold on tight to every “friendship” I had made up until now, but it all came down to my own lack of self confidence and a fear of being viewed in a negative light. But you know what? Keeping unhealthy friendships was detrimental to my well-being, was definitely not healthy for the other party who I was enabling, and generally ended in really nasty ways anyway. The bottom line? It’s okay to not let everybody be your friend. In fact, it’s a good thing.

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I used to be the kind of person who immediately gave my trust. This status quo only changed after I was wronged, and even then, as I mentioned, I had a very hard time walking away from those relationships. I have come to learn with time that you should be selective of who you give your friendship to and that trust is to be earned, not given out with an even hand to all. This may sound harsh, but instead of thinking that all people are trustworthy from the start, the mentality is to be just as democratic, but to think with a mindset that everyone has the ability to earn your trust, but only some will take up the challenge.

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Living in Germany has also taught me that “bff foreverz” takes time. That is not to say that you won’t meet those people with whom you hit it off with right off the bat and feel as if you have known them forever. These kind of people are such blessing, but are also few and far between – which is also okay, because that is what makes them all the more special! I know know that there is no reason not to get to know people a bit first before entrusting them with the label “friend.”

I grew up with the typical American mentality that hanging out with someone for more than an hour meant that we were friends, but in the end, it demeans the value of friendship to believe that it can be gained within an hour of simple small talk. Friendship is about truly learning who another person is, respecting them, and supporting them. For some reason I grew up thinking there was nothing in between stranger and friend, but wait a minute! But there is a reason why the word “acquaintance” exists and it is not a bad word either. Relationships are not static. An acquaintance can very well turn into a close friend, just a close friendship can definitely wane (which is okay!).

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Now I do not pretend to believe that I will never have another falling out with another human being. Sometimes people grow apart, sometimes we misjudge others or misjudge our compatibility with another. But it’s insane to me when I recall the fact that I was unable to walk away from negative situations with old friends or old boyfriends because I was more concerned with someone hating or disliking me (justly or unjustly) and burning bridges than I was about my own damned feelings and well being. Now, if I see that a relationship is not a truly positive one, I am able to step away and protect myself because I respect myself. Ultimately, in addition to trying to do right by others, you also need to do right by yourself.

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Being surrounded by the right people should be a mutually beneficial and supportive relationship that should bring both people joy, so it’s crazy to me that I allowed such unhealthy people to get so close to me and continuously hurt me. But at the end of the day, I am just as responsible because I let it happen. But the best part is, I have the agency to prevent it from continuing. And I have! As I near the end of my twenties, I feel as if in the past few years I have come a long way with what I will and will not put up with in both romantic and personal relationships.

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Perhaps age breeds wisdom, perhaps it’s the fact that I have realized life is too fleeting to waste any moment of it; what I do know for sure, is that I can happily say that those who I have allowed to be close to me are people I truly respect and want around. At 28, I also simply do not have time for needless drama. Ain’ nobody got time for that shit, if you ask me. After all, to let someone into your inner circle, to share a relationship as intimate as a friendship, is an honor – and I am so blessed that those in my life choose to count me amongst their closest of friends as well.

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And so, Artur, Betti, Norman, Azura, and Joe – thank you for being there for me. Jon, Timko, Carl, and Nicole – so glad everytime I come back to the US we are able to pick up just where we left off. And to new friends: Mosco, Joel, Barbara, Jamal, Wojciech, Banks, Paul and many more – thanks for enriching my life and making my world a better place.

Photography: Sandro Mosco

Don’t forget to check out LFB’s podcasts & sign up for LFB’s conscious living challenge.

Stay conscious, Rae


January’s lovely sponsors: Adventures of an Anglophile | Yellow Icing

Rae Tilly

Rae the EIC of LFB and YEOJA Magazine. She is also a photographer and social media influencer.


  • You look so cute in this look my dear
    Lovin the fur coat too.

    • rae

      Thanks so much! And yes, I am all about the faux fur coats!

  • Kim

    This post completely resonates with me. I always wanted to be friends with everyone I met, and unwittingly let people walk all over me with personal questions. This usually ended with me feeling vulnerable and sometimes betrayed, but now I know that it’s good to grow a friendship over time and that not everyone is going to make a great friend. It just makes close friendships all the more special and intimate.

    • rae

      So glad that you have also learned from the past and are more intentional with who you give your time to and who you allow to get close to you. I think we oftentimes think that if we do not try to be everyone’s friends we are mean or cold but that is not the case. Everyone has the potential to become a friend but they need to earn that spot, and not just be given it freely.

  • I could relate to this completely. There have been too times when I trusted people naively only to get used, betrayed and lied about. I do hope that I learned well from my mistakes,but sometimes in the excitement of meeting someone you like as a friend I tend to over “blab” and tell them a lot more about myself than I intended. And I’ve had my fair share of evil people in my life x)
    On a different note, I really love your blue hair! And the outfit is so lovely :)

    • rae

      I think that we all have to go through these experiences to then finally figure out what works for us and how we should navigate relationships. I am really sorry to hear that you have had some bad experiences in the past but I am also sure that you have learned from it Also, I think we all have the tendency to overshare now and then when we meet somoene new that we seem to really click with! I also think it is not good to dwell over these things once they are done!

  • I think it comes with age, and being comfortable with yourself, and others. But mostly yourself. Ain’t got time for that, messing about and such. Time is given to the people who you know deserve it, and can’t wait to see. Much love.

    Buckets & Spades

    • rae

      Definitely – I really am a firm believer that we need to go through these experiences and get burned a few times to realize and appreciate what a true friendship truly is. And totally – when we are comfortable with ourselves it makes all the difference! We should really only be giving our time out to those who deserve it. With you, 100%

  • I agree with your views on friendship. I had similar experiences and I learned that you really have to let go of some people even if it hurts. Also I just love your style. This outfit is beautiful and your coat is amazing!

    • rae

      Thanks so much Sara! And yes, letting go hurts but sometimes it is exactly what both people need to do!

  • I think this is beautiful. This posts resonates with me, Rae as someone who has friends but not a lot of them. To be honest, I’m not good at making friends but that’s more likely because I have a strong personality which has been called ‘intimidating’ but ‘memorable.’ It took me a while to accept it as a good thing. But that also meant, lots of people knowing me but not a lot of friends. Yes, acquaintances.

    But the friends I do have, those who stayed, are incredible. They are my companions. I think when your friend are you, in the sense you attract people like you or that what you need in each other. Better halves. Platonically and romantically. I’m lucky to have amazing friends, who are smart, and funny. We can talk about gender politics and racial prejudices during lunch break, and History notes the next. Friendship is an honour. One we must keep together. (Hey! That rhymed hahaha)

    xx Bash | H E Y   B A S H | bloglovin’

    • rae

      There are definitely people who can be threatened by very outgoing, strong personalities, but that should never make you feel bad about who you are and it is really good that you have been able to accept it as a good thing! Granted, I do think that people with strong personalities might need to take a bit extra care that others around them who may be less outgoing do not feel blindsided or steamrolled, but it’s always all about feeling out who you are around and being respectful of the ways they are and thier personalities as well regardless if you are super outgoing or super shy.

      It is also not so important to have a large number of friends but much more importantt to have good friends who you can really rely on and who can really rely on you! And ultimately, it is about finding people that can accept you for who you are and celebrate that person and finding people who you can accept and celebrate as well! I think it’s really great that you can also talk about deep topics with your friends. For me that is a super important element in my friendships.

  • you are so gorgeous rae! I am with your on your views. I’ve been burned by so many people in my life and now only let myself surround with inspiring and good people.

    • rae

      Ah, thank you so much, Kay! And it is so awesome that you are surrounded by inspiring and good people! Friendships should enhance life, not make them more stressful!

  • Shoshana

    This is a wonderful post. So well written as I could feel your emotions rolling off the screen. I have to say, I’m 4yrs older than you as an older, wiser woman i must say you’re very quickly. I myself have had some of the same experiences as you and I’m not a trusting person. I don’t consider everyone my “friend”. So are just acquaintances. Some are simply work friends or ballet class friends. I have ONE bff! When have been friends since we were 23yrs old. I met her because I was dating her brother. That relationship didn’t work out very early on but Kerri and I just clicked. She knows me so well. She knows my thought process, my emotions and accepts me for who I am, good & bad. Clearly I feel the same way about her. There have been many friends that have come and gone in my life. Sometimes the dissolving of a friendship has shocked me. I really thought I would have been friends with the person for a lifetime. Others, I knew they’d have an expiration date. I now believe there’s a friend for every reason & every season. Now some people take offense to that and I chalk it up they just have a different thought process. I have friends that I only drink with, I only snowboard with, I only talk politics with, I only do The Arts thing with. Then I have those full-body friends wherein we do everything together. I’m ok with that. Not everyone likes the ballet and not everyone wants to sit at a bar having a cocktail. That doesn’t mean we don’t enjoy each-others company in another capacity. Again, I’m ok with that. I’m at a point in my life where I value my time and if I’m spending it with you, I want to enjoy it. I also want to feel like I can share with you and vice versa. Mainly, I want to be able to trust you. If I don’t, I’ll enjoy you from a far or not at all. For you, you’ll probably have fewer close friends as the years go on but they’re going to be amazing relationships. Ok, I’ve go on and on, I’ll stop now. Sorry.

    • rae

      Thank you so much for this thoughtful comment! And you are right on the money here – I think it is entirely normal and a good thing! to have different friends for different reasons, because we are multi-faceted people! Some friends you have because they are great to go out for drinks with, others because you can have intellectual discussions with, others yet because they like some random obscure hobby you like. And then sometimes you do get lucky and meet a person that likes a multitude of these things – I think these are the kinds of people that actually have the potential to enter best friends territory. And yes, trust is key. But you are also totally right in that sometimes it is really shocking when a friendship ends as it can really be very unexpected! I have had one or two of those kinds of “friendship breakups” but not all friendships are meant to last forever.

  • It took me a while to learn the difference between an acquaintance and a friend; but like you said it comes with time and experience. I had to let go of a handful of “friends” in 2015 one of them being my best friend of 16 years- you live and you learn. One thing I’ve learned is, not everyone is as genuine and has the same intentions that you have so beware.

    It’s been challenging trying to teach myself how to trust again, but in life everything happens for a reason!

    Great post! I look forward to more great posts from you this year! xx

    Rhenicia | Beauty By Rhenicia

    • rae

      Time and experience is key for almost everything in life, if you ask me! And yes, you do live and learn. Sometimes we feel like if we have been friends with someone for a long time we NEED to make it work, or that if it doesn’t we have failed. But the amount of time you have been friends with someone doesn’t automatically correspond to how great of a friendship it is!

  • Your hair looks so beautiful! :)

    • rae

      Thanks, lady!

  • Rach

    What a great post and I can relate! It’s all about quality and not quantity when it comes to friendship. Thanks for sharing!

    • rae

      Agreed! Thanks, Rach!

  • Oh Hi there. Girl, I feel you. I have about five friends and they’re all my best friends, because I’m all or nothing, but I don’t need anymore than that, I’m not saying I close myself off to new friendships, far from it, but being friends with everyone is exhausting. It’s weird because this morning I wasn’t thinking about one friendship I have, at one point it was super unhealthy, and because I easily feed off others feelings, it was just a better idea to walk away, or spend less time together. Recently (in the last 6 months or so) the friendship has been better because we’ve both been in much better places. Last night friend was similar to how he used to be and I really realised how unhealthy it was. Friendships are just like romantic relationships at times, but we take so much more crap from friendships (or at least I do), and respecting yourself is intergral to having fullfilling friendships and relationships x

    • rae

      Yes! Respecting yourself is key to everything! Otherwise we allow ourselves to be in very unhealthy relationships. I totally agree with you that you cannot have a million best friends. First of all, that would really water down the meaning of a best friend, and second of all, we only have a limited amount of time, so the more people we have in our lives the less time we have with each person individually.

  • Elizabeth Hisle

    I love this x 1000. As someone who wanted to be friends with everyone, I later found myself with one good friend, whom I am still good friends with to this day. Everyone else were just people passing by…. and that’s ok. I do agree that trust should not be given so easily as we are taught to do. Respect and trust are things to be earned… if you trust everyone your heart will only be broken. Anyway, I would love to write more, but I am at work. I just wanted to say how much I could shout out this post to the rooftops.

    • rae

      Thank you so much for your comment, Elizabeth! So glad that it resonated with you! And yes! respect and trust ARE things to be earned!

  • I feel like I’m the opposite of you; that I hardly trust people if at all. I can make your acquaintance and we can have a chat, but you won’t be considered a friend because all we will be talking about are opinions and viewpoints. I’ll never divulge anything personal unless I feel like I have nothing to lose, but ah, that’s where I fall short because there’s always something to lose — it’s a way of life and this has caused quite the number of potential friendships to slip by, largely caused by the frustration I’ve most likely inflicted on the other party.

    I’ve become much better at this now, though! I definitely do think that I have room for improvement but I’m pretty content with my circle of friends. Loved this one, Rae.

    May | THE MAYDEN | bloglovin’

    • rae

      I think that the best way to be is in the middle – not too trusting but also not too skeptical. It is all about a balance :) Thanks for your input, May!

  • You look absolutely stunning. And I can relate! It took me quite a while to realize that there’s a huge difference between “hang-outs” and “friends” to be honest. I talk to many people but I only have like a group of 5 who are really really close friends. And that’s definitely enough for me I think. Being friends with many, like, all in, can be really exhausting.

    Hannie Arden from Missing Wanderer.

    • rae

      Thank you so much, Hannie! This took me a long time to realize as well and I think that breaking it down to “hang-outs” and “friends” is a good way to look at it. Being friends with too many people can be exhausting. Friendships should be respectful intimate relationships and those kinds of relationships take time. There is no way to be able to be a true and good friend if you have a gazillion of them, as we only have so many hours in a day and the more people we consider friends, the less amount of time we can give to each individual friend.

  • I love your hat, and shoes, and coat.. the list goes on.

    Thank you for dropping me a comment, I might not have found you otherwise! I love Berlin, it’s one of my favourite cities.

    I also love your hair, wow!

    Hannah x

    • rae

      Thanks so much Hannah! And of course! Berlin is pretty amazing, isn’t it?

  • Love your hair doll! And the coat is fab!!


    BLOG | Taislany

    • rae

      Thanks Thais!

  • I’m so happy to be reading how others perceive friendships and relationships; often times I feel like I’m at odds with even those closest to me due to personal expectations. I recently wrote on this myself and it felt good to put some feelings down on digital paper; plus I found that just writing about it helps me unwind a bit! This was such an enjoyable read. Love your outfit too; that dress is adorable!

    xo, Alice | Miss Inconnue

    • rae

      Writing is such a great way to get your thoughts out and to try to make sense of how you are feeling! So glad you enjoyed this read! And yes, relationships can be difficult when the two people involved have very different expectations. But I think it is important in that case to sit down with the person, discuss what both people expect, need and want, and to reach a compromise that works for both!

  • Naďa Černá

    You look great ! :)
    please follow my blog : THE COLORFUL THOUGHTS

    • rae

      Thanks, Nada

  • Thanks for sharing!! I really feel it’s been the last couple years that has taught me a lot about friendship as well. I’m 29.

    xo Annie

    • rae

      So glad that you feel that way! You are never too old to have those realizations!

  • Helena Dommor

    Love your outfit : ) The hat is amazing ; )

    • rae

      Thanks, Helena.

  • Cute hat! I love that color


    • rae

      Thanks, Jamie.

  • This is a lovely post, and a really great outfit as well, I love that coat! Friendships can be tricky. As a teenager, I was always down about not having “enough” friends, or not having close friends, but in the last few years I’ve learned that acquaintances are just as nice, and being friends with someone who exhausts you isn’t. This post has given me a lot to think about, so thanks for sharing!

    Amber | y a c h t s m a a n

    • rae

      Thank you so much, Amber! So happy that you liked this post. Friendships really can be tricky things. And I agree, I would rather have an acquaintance than a friend who is very difficult. So glad this post gave you some food for thought!

  • It’s incredible how much your words on what friendship has come to mean resonated with me. I feel the same way, and while I used to feel sad if I “lost” a “good” friend, I now know it’s just life. We are both better off cultivating the relationships that truly are meaningful and sometimes serendipitous way.
    Loved loved this post. And the outfit is sharp too ;)

    Xo Melissa | Cherish & Bloom

    • rae

      I am so glad that this post resonated with you! It really is a part of life, and it’s totally normal! I used to feel personally responsible for each and every relationship that did not work out, and now I realize that it’s just not the case. Sure, I am sure some friendships didn’t work out because of something I did, or a combination of what me and the other person did but sometimes the other person just messes up or the chemistry for that friendship is just no longer there.

  • I absolutely love your blog! Its great that you tell a story with each outfit. This is a great post and perspective about friendship. I’m looking forward to more of your post!

    Simply Racquel |

    • rae

      Thank you so much, Raquel! So glad you like this series and the stories that go with the outfits!

  • Sassy beautiful outfit and I am in love with that hair. You look fab.

    • rae

      Thanks, Barbrah!

  • I’ve had one big move in my life, and another move that didn’t feel quite as big. The one big one was after 4th grade from LA to Beijing. When I moved to Beijing, I lived amongst the expat community. People were always coming and going, and I met so many great people! And I wanted to hold onto all of them. I also wanted to hold onto all my friendships from elementary school in LA too. But of course, much changes since then. A friendship is mutual, and if the other person isn’t putting work into the relationship, it’s not fair to you. I’ve realized that just because I’m not friends with someone doesn’t mean that they don’t like me, and I don’t have to be friends with everyone I like and/or admire, and I don’t take it personally. Sometimes there are people you just vibe with. And there are some people that you don’t and that’s okay too. -Audrey | Brunch at Audrey’s

    • rae

      You bring up a really good point! I have also lost friends due to unrealistic expectations from friends back home since moving to Germany and I have also had so say so many goodbyes because Berlin is a very transient city full of ex pats who are constantly coming and going. So I totally can sympathise with wanting to hold on to all of them. You are totally right though, friendship IS mutual. Of course sometimes one picks up more slack than the other, but overall it should be a balanced relationship. And I agree so much with your second point – just because someone is not friends with you doe s not mean they automatically dislike you. So many people think it’s either BFFS forever or the other person hates you, but I know plenty of people who I like and respect but just do not click with enough for a friendship. Thanks so much for your input, Audrey!

  • 28?! Girl, you look like you just turned 20! I recently experienced the same thing with friendships. I have a good friend that I would put a lot of effort into and that I trusted. We formed a really good relationship after she broke up with her boyfriend, because I was in a situation similar to hers and we were able to empathize really well with each other. Long story short, I had a feeling that when she was no longer feeling sad about it, she’d give most of her attention to other friends and completely ignore me when we hung out in a group. But when it was just us two, it was like we were the best of friends. I’ve had that feeling for a while, but recently I decided to let her go because I decided it wasn’t worth trying to chase a friend like that. I’d say we’re acquaintances, but not good friends anymore.

    It’s so important to realize that good relationships are a two-way street. There’s that novelty of unconditional love or friendship, but I don’t think it’s something realistic to keep up with because honestly, nobody really puts effort into someone without expecting something back. Or maybe a nicer way to put it would be that people would put effort into someone because they’d do the same.

    becky ♡ star violet

    • rae

      Haha yea, I get that a lot! I am so sorry to hear about that friendship! But you definitely did the right thing! Friendships should not leave you feeling icky and unhappy after you hang out with the person. And sometimes we do forge a relationship with another person because we are going through a similar painful experience. Sometimes those people are only meant to be in our lives for a little while, so we can help that person and they can help us. And I could not agree more, friendships really are a two-way street. Now, someone may be doing more one month when the other is stressed, but the next month the other might be doing more. It should be a balance over time that shows that both people care and appreciate the other!

  • You look amazing and have such a beautiful style!! I love what you wrote very much, I also tend to trust people too easily sometimes. I love everything about this outfit! Have a nice day!

    xo, Esther

    • rae

      Thanks so much, Esther! It can be so easy to fall into the habit of trusting too easily, but it is definitely something that can be worked on!

  • Fifty Shades Of Pink

    The outfit is amazing and that dress is so cute!
    As they say, life is to short to waste it with people who don’t deserve it ;)

    • rae

      Thanks so much, and life really is too short to waste any second of it!

  • Gloria

    You look absolutely amazing my dear!!!
    xoxo, Gloria
    the Glamour Taste

    • rae

      Thanks, Gloria!

  • indiesuns

    I loved the outfit but I enjoyed reading this article way more, it’s true that you have to be very selective with your friendships and most of the time we have to learn the hard way, but that’s the thing about life… we always take the best lessons from our mistakes. Hope you and your team are doing great! xx
    Indie Suns | Bloglovin’

    • rae

      So happy that you enjoyed this read! Learning the hard way is just how life works, I truly believe. We need these experiences to understand the lesson after all!

  • idu

    You look stunning girl! Just like you I tend to be very trusting and end up getting burned and enabling people to get away with things. I guess shitty things happen to nice people. I really love your coat.

    • rae

      Thanks so much! And yes, I think that when you are overly nice, it can easily cause you to get taken advantage of!

  • Sophie Lee

    Your hair color is just awesome <3

    Love how you mix the dress with the coat <3

    XOXO from Best Bags 2016

    • rae

      Thanks, Sophie!

  • Vaida Tamošauskaitė

    i so loved reading this and as usual – your pictures! agreed with every single word about them friendships, relationships, you name it! i’m quite the same, actually. tho – used to be. i’ve lost a lot, and i’ve trusted everyone way too much. tho they all were great lessons, and now when i’m truly surrounded with true friends – i see how much it means, and how blessed i am :)
    thank you for sharing this. very inspiring, and so honest.. you are at the right point as always!

    Vaida @

    • rae

      Thank you so much for your lovely comment, Vaida! And yes, it oftentimes takes first learning and getting hurt to then truly find those good people whom we should have surrounded ourselves with all along!

  • Yellowicing

    I loved reading this post and I think I needed to read it too, every word struck me because it’s exactly what I’ve been through, I’ve stuck at blatantly toxic friendships for no good reason and I’ve been consumed by what people think of me, so this post was a breath of fresh air! Great photos too, you beaut!

    Lucy x- Yellowicing

    • rae

      So glad you enjoyed this read! and toxic friendships can be so hard to let go of because there is a part of them that is not just toxic but intoxicating. But in the end, it is best to let those people go and only focus on the positive people n your life! Thanks, Lucy!

  • Nancy Wilde

    I have a few, only a few, really good friends. Like 2 or 3 here in Ireland, 5 back in Portugal (and how I miss them!…) and 1 in Scotland. Friends are one of the most important things in life; when everything else falls apart, from family to love life, from bankrupcy to disease… well, friends are there for us, and that’s wonderful. As you wisely state, it’s okay not to be friends with everybody. Not everyone is trustworthy and also we have a hard time relating and connecting with other people. As we age, our standards also go higher and having a few things in common like favourite bands or books won’t be enough to sustain such bond. Also, you look splendid… Can’t believe you’re 28 ahah! :) xx

    • rae

      Thank you so much for this thoughtful comment, Nancy, and I could not agree with you more!

  • Fabulous outfit (That coat looks so cozy).
    This is one of the most important things that I feel I have learned in my early adulthood. I had a friendship that was quite toxic and unfortunately I also knew for certain that this individual did NOT have an understanding of the fact that some friendships fade and fall apart naturally. So it was tricky for me, feeling as though it was done but not sure how to let it happen nicely and without drama and I hated that I felt like the bad guy for quietly distancing myself. It’s definitely important to learn this and also to not take certain fall-outs personally, knowing what you know.

    • rae

      Could not agree with this comment more and you bring up a really good point. Sometimes we know that we need to end a relationship that is not good for either person, but it can be really hard to do so because we know that the other person will not react to it well. I guess in that case all we can do is try to be honest and upfront and not engage when the other tries to start drama, and as you say, to not take it personally!

  • Liyana❋

    LOVE your outfit! That dress is so unique, I love the detailing and how wonderfully it complements your coat.

    You wrote some very beautiful things in this post. Over the years I’ve come to realise the meaning of true friendship – relationships that truly stand the test of time and distance. Sometimes we forget that friendship is a two-way street and because of this, friends end up drifting apart… that being said, keeping a friend should never feel like a chore, but rather, an act that brings out comfort and happiness from within us because of the love that keeps our friends, and us, together :-)

    • rae

      Thanks so much Liyana! And I could not agree more. Friendships needs to be a two-way street in order for it to work but it should not feel like a chore either!

  • Such a great post! I used to always become “friends” with people straight away, but after unwanted drama and having my trust broken uncountable times, I am friendless, but I feel so content for once :) P.s you look amazing!

    Pop over to my blog!


    • rae

      Glad you are feeing content about your friendships! Thanks, Sarah!

  • I was hurt by a good friend and now its quite hard for me to make new friends and trust anyone again, luckily I have my sister and hubby as support. Lovely outfit by the way and you look great

    Nashia | MakeupandBeautyMayhem

    • rae

      I am really sorry that you experienced a bad friendship but I really hope you can open up again because I am sure there are some really amazing people just waiting to become part of your life!

  • i’ve lost so many friendships that have hurt me and i just couldn’t understand; thinking positive and surrounding yourself with good people who bring you good vibes is the best though. On another note, that coat, omg! so flawless.

    • rae

      Yes, the best we can do is forgive and move on, only including healthy and positive people in our lives! Thanks, Kierra!

  • Karole Josefa Bonnet

    you are beautiful! lovely outfit and perfect pictures!


    • rae

      Thanks Karole!

  • First of all, I never realized you were 28. I honestly thought you were in your early 20s! Your skin is amazing! Girly ooh-aah-ing aside, on to the meaty stuff in your post.

    I could really relate to what you wrote here. I also had a lot of experiences where I was afraid to be perceived in a negative light, or in a less proud moment, was the person doing the wronging that burned bridges. You live and you learn, right? I do think that people make the verbal jump from stranger to friend quite easily. People are afraid to offend others by using the word friend instead of acquaintance, but I’d say most fall into the latter. The acquaintance is that person you shoot the crap with when you run into them. Maybe you get coffee once in a while. A real friend is the one hoofing it through with you in your hard times, who is happy for you in your good, and vice versa.

    “Ultimately, in addition to trying to do right by others, you also need to do right by yourself.” YESYESYES.

    It’s good to love others, but it’s more important to practice self-love first.