Anatomy of this Outfit: Blouse – Sandro | Sweater – Urban Outfitters | Sweater Jacket – Free People | Shorts – Free People | Tights: – H&M | Mary Janes – Urban Outfitters


anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

An interesting thing happened to me recently – I experienced what I would like to call aspirational envy for the first time. Now, aspirational content has been a pretty widely discussed topic, especially ever since a popular Australian teenager made headlines for “quitting the internet.” Now, the jury’s still out on if the whole thing was legit or just a bigger attempt at trolling for more fame, but the point raised was one I think most people were quite aware of in the social media world, either as content creators, content consumers, or both: Aspirational content, proliferated by the internet age, can cause us to long for the kind of lifestyle we think other people are living.

Now, I have touched on the subject of social media and creating aspirational content in the wake of this news story hitting the internet by storm (although as all things with the internet, the whole buzz around O’Neill has seemed to die down just as quickly as it flared up), but I would like to approach the topic again, from a more personal level.

anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

As far as social media content goes, I am just as excited by creating it as I am by consuming it. I love reading blogs, scrolling through instagram, and although I am not on youtube (yet! Although I will be soon), my video consumption is basically made up of 50% youtube (the other 50% made up by netflix, movies, news, and other). However, during the big move and subsequent break from the blogging world, I also found myself not having time to check the instagram feeds and youtube channels of some of my favorite social media influencers.

Being consumed by things in my immediate surroundings – moving, spending time with friends, working on photography projects, etc. – meant that my only frame of reference was the world around me and the people in my life with whom I interact with face to face. I am not a very envious person by nature, and am really supportive of my friends, so there was nothing causing me to feel any sense of inadequacy. When it came to any type of competitive emotions, those feelings were centered around competing with myself – becoming the best version of who I was. I was self-centered, but in a good way. “Self-focused” is probably a better way of explaining it.

anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

But when I found myself with a little bit of time for youtube or instagram, I found that scrolling through beautiful photos of adventuring in campers and watching vlogs of beautiful people having the time of their life in California was actually starting to get to me a bit. I wanted to be traveling the globe from an airstream or going to open air festivals in the desert.

I was experiencing aspirational envy; viewing aspirational content on instagram, or lifestyle videos on youtube ceased to inspire or ceased to be a healthy form of vicarious living and started to cause feelings of inadequacy. (For some reason, I feel as if this happens less with blog reading, which is why I have consciously left out blogging.) I actually found myself at 28 wondering why I wasn’t having “the best week ever” (nod to vh1 here, for anyone who gets this reference), why my stomach wasn’t flat enough, or why I wasn’t as successful. For me, it was less about any specific person but more about a lifestyle I was wishing I had.

anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

Now, clearly as a blogger and someone who has chosen to have a strong online presence, I love social media and think that many people fail to see the incredible aspects of being able to connect with people hundreds of miles away. I have also met so many incredible people through social media – many of whom I now count amongst some of my dearest friends. But the drawback is “aspirational envy.” And we are all susceptible to it and will be plagued by it at least once (if not more!) in our lives.

But here is the funny thing – my life IS awesome. And I am sure there are other people who would scroll through my instagram feed and have the same aspirational envy. But its just not the same when you know the behind-the-scenes of every photo. Some are as effortless and spur-of-the-moment as they look and feel. But some are not. Strung together in a feed, they give off this air of lighthearted perfection. But while my feed is not a lie, it’s filtered (literally and figuratively) and missing all the bad parts. And although I intellectually understand that this is the case for every other social media influencer out there and their feed, or youtube channel, or blog, viewing the highlights reel of other men and women still got to me.

anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

I also recently started a new instagram account full of images that don’t really fit with my main account (Don’t worry, this does relate to my story, I promise!). I don’t care about the number of followers at all, and it’s full of badly lit photos, and hastily filtered images, and even some photos of myself that are less than flattering. They aren’t curated enough to be used on my main account, but but it’s full of life and allow me to share with my friends and family both here in Berlin and back home what I am up to. And when I scroll through those images, I think, “wow I want to be living that kind of a life full of fun and full of incredible people!” But then I realize I am, because that is my life. It’s maybe not photographed with the kind of precision I shoot things when it’s work-related, but it’s raw and it’s fun and it expresses who I am.

anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

Don’t get me wrong. @lovefromberlin is also who I am. And I love creating content for that feed. It’s a constant challenge to push myself artistically and creatively. But’s it not all of what I am about. It would be crazy to think that anyone is only their instagram feed, or their blog, or their youtube channel. Which is why I have multiple accounts – it’s a way for me to put who I am out there in the world wide web in all it’s many different forms.

And while I do sometimes find it unfortunate that the social media world is such where we somehow need to split these two parts of who we are into a “private” and “public account,” it also makes sense, because LFB, @lovefromberlin, and @photograephie are my job. @little__adventures is my life. But all of these things combined are me.

anatomy of an outfit 033 - photography: sandro moscogiuri - lovefromberlin.net

My little blip with aspirational envy was short-lived and I have also gotten back into scrolling through instagram and viewing the most recent videos from users I am subscribed to on youtube. But I think that is it important to work on creating the kind of balance necessary where aspirational content from social media sources is consumed in a way that inspires us and urges us to push our own content to new heights in a positive way, and that “real world content” takes up the majority of our time.

For me, social media, blogging, and content creating – whether if it is for LFB, instagram, or through my photography work – are extremely important things to me. But I don’t want to miss out on actually living life. I want to separate both aspects of my life, but also ultimately want to be able to combine then elegantly. To have the best of both worlds in equal mixed doses. Besides, nothing makes for better content at the end of the day, than honest to goodness living. And the best kind of living is the kind where you’re just doing it.

Photography: Sandro Moscogiuri
Edits: Rae Tashman



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Rae

Rae Tashman is both the creative mind behind LFB and a freelance photographer. She lives in Berlin with her two fur babies and loves creating images and living consciously.

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  • Miriam Woodburn

    Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts, I can relate to this so much <3

    http://www.miriamwoodburnblog.co.uk

    • rae

      Glad you enjoyed the post, Miriam.

  • It’s interesting that you pointed out that blogs don’t make you feel this way. My Instagram is a personal one like your new one, where I only follow people I know, and the only youtube I really watch is Buzzfeed, so I can’t really say how those things make me feel. In terms of blogs i read, most of the blogs I follow are personal ones where I feel like I’ve gotten to know the blogger as a person (weird thing to say cause I know blogs are just a tiny snapshot of people’s lives), so when they get to do cool things i’m not doing, I feel more excitement for them rather than envy (although envy has happened!). Maybe because an Instagram picture has the ability to be *so* curated and such a narrow portrayal of one second in a person’s life?

    Jane / deluminators

    • rae

      I think you bring up a really good point and when I think about it, I think it is the same for me when it comes to blogs. Since blogs tend to have more substance (or at least the blogs I choose to read are ones with more substance and personal posts), I feel like I am getting to know a complex person rather than just viewing perfectly curated images, like I sometimes feel I am when scrolling through instagram. In terms of youtube, I actually tend to watch just as many documentaries, true crime, and political channels as I do vloggers, but it’s sometimes these perfectly manicured vlogs of constant event-hopping that I enjoy watching but sometimes makes me think I am not as successful as I should be, but these are similar to instagram in the sense that it’s a really curated view of things. Although blogs tend to also be carefully edited, I think the added voice of a real person who also questions things and talks about the good and the bad make blogs a lot more conversational and relatable. Sidenote, but it’s also funny that platforms like youtube and instagram seem to be more popular because of the fact that they are “shallower” (for lack of a better word) than blogs because they take little effort to consume whereas blogging involves reading, even if this feature makes instagram and youtube less relatable.

  • I agree life about actually living, breathing and taking in moments. I tried and not get caught up in other people’s life, no matter how glossy, fun or awesome it looks – of course I feel the pangs of aspirational envy too but it’s a passing feeling rather than letting it consume me!

    I use Snapchat as a fun, unfiltered way to share with with friends rather than making it look insta worthy! I can see why you have multiple accounts, it’s nice to share different parts of our personality. Sometimes we’re goofy, nerdy or feeling sassy and fierce, it’s still a reflection of who we are :)

    Look forward to seeing your future videos Rae :)

    Hanh | hanhabelle

    • rae

      It should definitely never be an all-consuming thing, and I feel bad if it has turned into that for anyone. For me it is less about being envious of a specific person and more about me wondering if I am doing something wrong in terms of not being as successful as I think I should be when looking at other people who seem to have “made it.”

      I love snapchat too and also use it as an unfiltered way to let people take a look at my life. I also love the fact that you can’t really view people’s profiles or see how many people are following them because it take the competitive nature away from the medium.

  • Interesting insight! I’ve had trouble with not wanting to show the whole me on social media, but still having pics that I want to share with some but maybe not others. This is a great way of doing it! Thank you for your insight!

    • rae

      So glad you enjoyed this post and glad that you have found it insightful!

  • Really interesting read, I don’t really get envious of other people’s lives (probably cos I’m hardly ever on Instagram!) but I do get quite envious of their blogging skills and success (similar things, I know!) But at the same time I guess those are things I could improve on if I devoted more time to blogging and that would probably involve more time on social media which would probably lead to lifestyle envy haha xxx
    Lucy @ La Lingua ; Food, Travel, Italy

    • rae

      I think any kind of envy is normal, but it has more to do with the fact that we are taking someone else’s success or someone else’s perceived success and somehow turning it into something about ourselves and how we are not as successful as the other person, which is actually both selfish and self-deprecating. I think when we have these thoughts we need to remind ourselves that we are all at different stages of our journeys and that we all come from different starting points – some have it easier than others – and to try to use the people we see as successful as role models rather than let it get to us and make us feel bad about ourselves.

  • First, I love the outfit of course.
    Second, I completely understand the aspirational envy. It’s funny that you acknowledged that you know others probably look at your instagram and think, “Wow, that life is incredible! I want that!” because I was JUST doing that yesterday. The world happening around other people seems so much more glamorous than when it happens to you. But you also notice how incredible your life is and how the idea of self-focusing is so important for your development and that’s something that I’m learning to give more and more importance! This insight was great and there’s something comforting about knowing that even the people you “envy” (although I wouldn’t use that word to describe how I feel about you!) feel this too every once in a while!

    Also, thanks for another instagram account and youtube account to follow! I’ve been wanting to do youtube, but I’m terrified for some reason! You go, girl!

    • rae

      Thanks so much for your comment, Kiersten and I could not agree with you more! I think it is important to remember that even for those people who seem to be doing incredible things all the time, they also have to do the same mundane tasks that we all have to do, like the laundry, or cleaning the flat and I am sure they also have some days where they are bored and home alone.

  • Such an interesting read! I think we need to remember that what we see is “content”, not 100% of someone’s life. As you say, it is often true and real, but it is edited. When I am creating content for my blog I always strive to find a balance between it being authentic but reserving some of my life, my thoughts and feelings to myself. Funnily enough, I often find it easier to open up when I am leaving a comment somewhere else, probably because there are lots of people I work with daily that read my blog and I don’t want them to see the inner workings of my brain or my soul. My point is that if we remembered that it is a small fragment of the whole picture and also paid as much (if not more) attention to our life we would be much more centered and less at the mercy of the green eyed monster. But ultimately, it is also only natural and we should be kind to ourselves when we feel a bit envious.

    Inma x
    sunshineandglow.blogspot.com

    • rae

      So glad that you enjoyed this read, Inma! And yes you are entirely right! Although I think it is important to be truthful and honest in the blogging and social media world, it is a curated version meaning it is content – it’s the best of the best of someone’s life, but it is definitely not all of it! I can also understand wanting to keep certain things personal out of choice! Just because we choose to put our lives online, does not mean we have to put all of it online!

  • This was so interesting to read and I could definitely relate with you on so many levels. The more my Instagram account grows the more pressure I feel to post the perfect photos, whilst leaving out the behind the scenes shots (I save those for Twitter and Snapchat though). It’s not that I am afraid to show behind the scenes in any way but I feel like I want to continually improve the way I look at Instagram aesthetically and hope that no-one actually truly believes that life is perfect in that way. Even if I get some sort of jealousy from other accounts I always remind myself that they are only showing the best version of themselves x

    Beauty with charm | Benefit Cheekathon Giveaway

    • rae

      I can totally relate to what you are saying – it’s definitely how I have been approaching my instagram account for LFB. That’s why I think it is so fun to have a private account or snapchat for the more rugged, less curated things.

  • Another super interesting read, Rae! I’ve been suffering from horrendous Writer’s Block lately with regards to my blog and online channels and I think it’s – annoyingly – stemming from comparing myself to the super curated content out there. While of course I also curate my feeds to an extent and consider the bigger picture from an outsider’s POV, I’d like to think I present an authentic reality in a highlights format? Sharing the good in my day, sometimes the bad, sometimes the ugly, all in varying levels of ‘considered’. I very much keep my Twitter and Instagram channels a public/private platform: my real-life friends and family follow me on there and although I keep to a filter theme of sorts, I also keep the story real, the chronology and ‘me-ness’ real. My blog? That place delves much further into my thoughts and opinion and frivolous chatter that my aunties don’t care for ;)

    Brilliant post girl xx

    • rae

      So glad that you enjoyed this read, Michelle! I think it can be really hard to create content, when you struggle with what to feel is appropriate content. Not only can it be difficult to come up with a topic in general, having the added pressure of making sure the topic you do finally come up with fits with the current trends of the curated blogging world can make things really stressful. I think that authenticity is really important, but things can also still be curated an authentic. However, if everything is always staged, I think that can become problematic. I think it is great that you have also solved the problem of your public and private online persona in a way that works for you.

  • So beautifully written. Having just joined the blogging world I am still learning to find balance between what I do online and what I do in life. I also have separate instagram accounts, one personal for friends and family and then my blog account which I use for my blog. I think it is very important to take a step back and look at the online presence you have because as you said, the internet can connect you to people across the world. That is one thing I love about it as well, you can make friends all over the world which is such an an incredible gift the internet and social media has given us =o)

    http://dreamofadventures.blogspot.com/

    • rae

      Even though you are new to the blogging world, it seems like you are off to a pretty good start of keeping things separate and not getting to in over your head! And yes, blogging, tweeting and instagramming has brought me to so many incredible people and I am so thankful for that!

  • thefashionsalt

    This is such a great read and I can completely relate. Before I started blogging I had taken time off of the computer completely and was living a simple, but wonderful life. There was nothing I wanted or really envied. When I started blogging and reading blogs I found myself wanting lots of new clothing and accessories, and adding makeup to my basically non existent beauty routine. And although I am tempted to leave the internet, there are positives such as all of the wonderful people I’ve met and all the interesting things that I’ve learned. Beautiful post!
    ~Lili
    http://www.thefashionsalt.com

    • rae

      I think you have touched on another really important aspect of blogging and social media that I haven’t even mentioned here – the feeling that we need to consume new products to be up to date with the latest trends. For me this is less of a problem, because although I would not consider myself a minimalist, I am blogging from a conscious lifestyle perspective, so I am not really focusing on commercialism and consumerism, but I can definitely relate, in that sometimes when I see someone post about a new product, I really want to try that product out too. I think that this is entirely fine, and blogs and youtube are great for opening our minds to new products that might really work for us, but we should definitely try not to get to carried away with it! And I could not agree with you more – the internet has been such a great way for me to meet so many interesting people around the world, that I could never part with it! Glad to hear you plan to stick around the blogging world too, Lili!

  • Such a beautiful post. Love the outfit and your hair I don’t even have to mention right? Gorgeous!!

    Happy Friday!! Kisses,

    BLOG | TAISLANY

    • rae

      So glad you enjoyed this post.

  • Elizabeth Hisle

    Perfect timing today. I am also in the moving process and have found my semi-break rather refreshing. Recently, I went and unfollowed some accounts that were giving my aspirational envy, simply because I don’t want to be envious. I don’t want to sit and try to curate the perfect moment in a competition with someone. I don’t want to feel like my life is less than someone else’s, because realistically everyone has crappy moments. I just want a balance. So if posting a little less on IG can help me achieve that, I’ll take this moment to enjoy the calm.

    BTW, LOVE that jacket!

    aroseisinbloom.blogspot.com

    • rae

      I think that unfollowing is one way to kind of step away from the kind of aspirational envy the internet and social media has created, but I think it would also be lovely where you can get to the point where you can consume those things and feel happy while doing so. Still, I also think it is a really smart move to remove what is triggering you. All for enjoying the calm and trying to strike the perfect balance!

  • First off, beautiful outfit! It’s so quirky but cute! Kind of like Zooey Deschanel meets New Wave Boho Chic in the best way possible. Secondly, I know what you mean completely. I decided to have an online presence relatively recently, just over a year, after being very quiet and not caring about social media honestly. I was perfectly content posting a photo every three months to my small group of friends and family. Now, ever since I started this presence, everything seems curated and edited to meticulous fashion. Which didn’t bother me, since it wasn’t personal and I dislike having my life put up there.

    And while that distance between my real life, and my social media life is present, I feel like whenever I was on social media, I would hurt myself. Subconsciously comparing myself to these other bloggers and other girls. Not being pretty enough, relatable enough etc. So I what I did instead was back away from it. I disabled my notifications and focused on other activities in life. And boy, am I SO much happier!

    xx Bash |   go say   H E Y   B A S H

    • rae

      Thanks so much, Bash! And actually I never thought of this outfit in that way before, but I totally get what you mean now that I look at it – for me it was more of a nod to my love of rockabilly, but I see where you are coming from as well!

      I think it is a smart move to back away from what may be triggering you, but like I was saying to Elizabeth, I also hope you can get to a point where you can consume content from other bloggers and instagrammers without feeling envious or bad about yourself. Still, if focusing on other activities and stepping away from social media is what makes you happy, then do that!

      I find that in general, whenever I am feeling down about anything, the thing that makes me the happiest is to surround myself with my closest friends and go do something outside away from the internet. The internet is a great place, but we also need a balance in oder to remain happy.

  • Doreen’s Style Diary

    What a beautiful article. Love this fun outfit on you. Your hair color is so pretty.

    http://doreensstylediary.com

    • rae

      Thanks, doreen.

  • idu

    First off i have to say I love your hair Rae. You look totally amazing. This is really deep and I think everyone experiences aspirational envy to an extent. There is such a thin line between living vicariously through others and feeling inadequate (aspirational envy). We are all on different levels or life would be super boring. My belief is that even the stars experience what we experience cos they’re human just like us. Someone is always living better, doing better, seeing more, looking better, has more etc. That’s just the truth. On the flip side, everyone has at least someone who has aspirational envy towards them. The circle of life. And we all want to “fit in”. Plain is no longer acceptable. What’s ok has been redefined. By who might I ask? Its a crazy world. One just needs to be strong enough to withstand the pressure. Yes the pressure, it is real. I enjoyed reading this. have a lovely weekend babe.

    http://fashionablyidu.blogspot.com/2016/05/turn-up-heat.html

    • rae

      “There is such a thin line between living vicariously through others and feeling inadequate (aspirational envy).”
      Could not agree with you more here. I think that even the most mature and emotionally developed of us still face this at some point. I don’t think it’s really about feeling jealous of one particular blogger or instagrammer and their life and more about viewing different blogs and instagram accounts and coming away with the general feeling of not being good enough, but we really need to remind ourselves that what really matters most is our immediate life and the people around us. Now the internet does play a huge role in our immediate lives these days and that is entirely fine, but we should also be more focused on how we want to portray ourselves rather than worry about how other people are portraying themselves. And yes, someone will always be better, prettier, thinner, kinder, smarter, richer, you name it. But someone will also always feel the same about you too. Which is why we should always remember to keep our egos in check but also our insecurity in check too. At the end of the day, we are all just trying to do the best we can, or at least we should be! Hope you had a lovely weekend too, lady!

  • Diana Maria

    This is such a great post. I love your sense of style, as always you look stunning and so stylish! Sometimes I feel the same exact way, and feel like I should be doing more with my life because I see what others are doing on social media. I do think social media can definitely be deceiving at times, and I think it’s normal to feel inadequate because of it. I always try to remember that pictures have a story behind them, and things aren’t always as perfect as they seem! Inspiring content is great though because those positive platforms that do talk about the bad help remind me that nothing is perfect, and that’s okay. I think social media can be a great tool if you allow it to be, and I honestly truly enjoyed reading this post!

    My Lovelier Days

    • rae

      Thanks so much, Diana! Found myself nodding in agreement with everything that you have written as well! It sounds to me like you have a very healthy take on social media :)

  • You look beautiful as ever.
    I get what you mean about aspirational envy. I swing wildly between having it and rejecting it and saying “Fuck this, I swear, I drink and my life is 100% not curated for anyone but me”. I see other peoples beautiful lifestyles and then remember that actually, I love the grime and dirt of where I am and what I do. I love that I’m fairly hedonistic and fairly ridiculous, the truth is as much as I have aspirational envy at times, it’s not enough to make me change my life, and I think thats so important to remember, it means that actually I am totally comfortable in my life and surroundings, because if I do want to change something, I do. It is so easy to forget that we’re only seeing the good bits of someones life though, and that a filter can make anything look good. I did go through a phase of attempting to curate my instagram feed, but I couldn’t keep it up, because in actual fact, I felt like I was being dishonest to myself and everyone else too, which is 100% my problem.
    TL:DR – I agree with you, girl, as usual ;)
    Erin

    • rae

      Thanks so much, Erin! I could not agree with your comment more. As for the dirt and grime, as much as I love curated pintrest-worthy things, I am also just as happy going to punk shows in squats. Both are a part of my life and I am proud of the fact that my interests are diverse and may even be seen as contradictory to some. We are round not flat characters, and I think that is a pretty awesome fact. I think that curating feeds is entirely fine if you approach your feed as art or an extension of your job, which I do, but it should never make you feel dishonest. That is why I have two, because my curated instagram is completely me and represents one side of me, but my personal instagram with pics from shows and bbqs in the park is also me as well.

  • I get that all the time! Like it’s my biggest dream to travel around the world, and I managed to save a little and jet off to Dubai! But when I came back and started to get back into the blogosphere, I saw people on holiday 24/7 with perfect hair and bodies and wondered why I didn’t look or feel so perfect! But then, I remembered that I had so much fun, actually immersing myself with the locals and their culture rather than looking perfect and staying on a resort. I learnt about how hailing a taxi with your arm is not a good idea and how trying to speak a foreign language is not stupid for the natives because they actually will love you for trying!

    Pop over to my blog!

    Sarah

    sarahinks.co.uk

    • rae

      It makes me so sad to hear that seeing other bloggers made you feel less about your own experience, but I am so happy that you realized that your experience was amazing and special. No matter what anyone else is doing, it does not take away from the amazing and incredible things you have done in your own life and jetting off to Dubai sounds incredible! And yes, I am all for immersing myself in a new culture over looking perfect poolside at a resort as well!

  • The Reader’s Tales

    Oh Wow! Rae you look fabulous dear! Spectacular photos too ;-) And thank you for your visit!

    • rae

      Thanks so much!

  • I feel like MOST individuals today suffer from aspirational envy, but one of my favourite quotes ever is “The reason why we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” How true is it when it comes to social media sometimes? I love having days, or even weeks, where keeping in loop with social media is the last thing on my mind, kind of reshifts your focus for a bit – like what you felt when you took a little break :)

    Checking out your new insta page now! :)

    Raashi
    raashiagarwal.blogspot.com.au

    • rae

      Oh totally, that quote is so true and when you can remember this, than it makes everything easier to swallow. To be honest, I do not suffer from aspirational envy often, but sometimes when I scroll through instagram and see all the stunning photos, I do feel like I should be doing more and accomplishing more sooner. But it is also important to remember that I am scroling through tons of photos from different people – it’s not like everyone is always having a 3-ring circus all the time!

  • I think it’s really hard to be on social media and not suffer from some sort of aspirational envy. For me, I’m more envious about the actual content than the ideas behind it i.e. “that persons photos are so much better than mine” rather than “that persons lifes better than mine”. Because I know how curated my feed is, I think it’s easier to understand the effort required for others to make their photos flawless / effortless looking. I catch me and my very intelligent / socially aware friends doing things like getting frustrated if an Instagram photo doesn’t get a certain amount of likes in a certain amount of time and I think it’s important not to associate that stuff with our self worth. It’s interesting that it doesn’t happen so much with blogging – perhaps because it’s mostly about connecting with other people and sharing our stories! xx

    Jessthetics

    • rae

      Definitely. While I am not plagued by it too often, and tend to try to focus on myself, it does happen every now and then while scrolling through instagram and seeing all of the incredible photos and things that people are doing – but it’s also important to remember that when scrolling, we are seeing photos from many different people doing various different things – it’s not like it’s just one person doing all of those fantastic thing – and even if it were just one person, that is their life and we should not compare ours to theirs. I tend to get frustrated with instagram on my work feed, but when it comes to my personal one, I really do not care about numbers at all. I think it is important not to care about numbers in terms of seeing it as a reflection of your self worth because that is just silly, but when it is a work account and numbers do correlate to “success,” it is natural to sometimes get frustrated about things. I think it happens less with blogging because blogging is less “superficial” (for lack of a better word) than instagram where you are mostly just looking at beautiful images and not really getting to know the person behind the photo or instagram feed like you do with most lifestyle blogs.

  • I experience this all the time omg. Social media does have a huge influence on me because wow, look at what all these people are doing, I wanna do that too! I feel like everyone at some point has suffered from aspirational envy and it can be great thing, you know, like a push out of your comfort zone. Great post! I can finally put this feeling into words.

    Hugs,
    Hannie Arden from missingwanderer.org.

    • rae

      It definitely affects us all from time to time, but as you said it is great when it can push you out of your comfort zone!

  • Firstly, I am head over heels for thsi outfit. Love the mixing of prints and I am just slightly obsessed with your blouse. I definitely suffer from aspirational envy regarding social media and it sometimes reminds me of my insecurity and makes me wonder if my life will ever be exciting enough to make others envious too. Everyone’s life is precious and has the potential to be something great, but it’s definitely subjective and it’s all about being positive and what you make of it, right? :)

    thesixthdisneyprincess.blogspot.com

    • rae

      Thanks so much, Jasmine! And yes, it is subjective and we are only seeing the best of someone else’s life so it is important to keep that in mind and focus on our own lives and what we can do within our own lives to be happier than looking at how other people are living theirs!

  • So true, that the best kind of living is just doing it. :) You take such good photos! And I love your outfit too!
    xo, Lou | Caffeine Rush

    • rae

      Thanks, Louise! And could not agree with you more!

  • Nancy Wilde

    Oh God, you look so pretty! Outfit envy right now ahaha!
    Comparison and expectation are the root of all frustration, isn’t it? :/